Dinosaur Story
by Emily E
Summary: Barney the dinosaur visits Bonnie's room and ends up annoying the heck out of everybody, so Woody plots to rid of the obnoxious purple doll. Characters belong to their owners.
1. Chapter 1

It was just an ordinary day at Bonnie's house. The toys were gathered around what appears to be the package of a new toy that Bonnie received.

"Whataya think it is?" asked Slinky, a dog that that was also a slinky.

"I hope it's another dinosaur!" said Rex, who was a green dinosaur himself.

"What Rex said," remarked Trixie, who was a blue triceratops.

"Attention, people!" announced Woody who was the cowboy doll, even though nobody in here was a person. They were in fact toys. "Whoever this mysterious stranger is, let's all make sure to give him a warm welcome."

"But what if he's not nice to us?" asked Mr. Potato Head, a plastic potato.

"Yeah," stated a piggy bank named Hamm. "Or what if he's annoying?"

"Y'know guys," said Woody. "I was thinking the exact thing before I met Buzz. Come to think of it, where is that space pilot?"

"Don't you remember?" asked Mr. Prinklepants, who happened to be a hedgehog dressed in a green outfit. "Bonnie chose him to take along with her to Pizza Planet."

"Oh, right," muttered Woody. "Anyway, let's just be nice to the new toy, okay?"

Just then, the package began to shake. Someone was in there. The toys stared closely with anticipation. Suddenly, the top flew open. A purple, annoyingly happy dinosaur jumped out to meet his new friends.

"Hee hee!" laughed the dinosaur. "Hi, everyone! My name is Barney!"

"Howdy there," greeted Woody. "Welcome to Bonnie's room. I'm Woody and these here are my buddies."

"Why, hello there!" said Barney. "How are you this lovely morning? It is so nice to meet you guys on this super-dee-duper day!"

"Wait a minute," said Slinky. "I know him. That's the guy from that show Bonnie always watches."

"Oh, brother," groaned Hamm.

"Why are you so upset?" Barney asked the piggy bank.

"Because you're the reason why I had that stupid song stuck in my head all day yesterday."

"You mean this song?" Barney began to sing very obnoxiously. "I love you! You love me! We're a happy family!"

"SHUT UP!" yelled Mr. Potato Head.

Barney gasped at Mr. Potato Head's statement.

"Oooooo!" accused the reptile. "The funny man with the mustache said a bad word!"

"I'm Mr. Potato Head, you fossilized freak. And you are the most annoying toy I ever came across."

"A potato is an example of a healthy food," recited Barney. "This reminds me of a song I know about healthy eating. Wanna sing along?"

"No!" shouted the toys.

"Oh!" Barney exclaimed. "I know what we can do! Let's all go back in time and meet Christopher Columbus. Here we go!"

Barney began spinning around and around. However, he failed to go back in time. The only thing he succeeded in is making himself dizzy.

"Guess what, pal?" Mr. Potato Head told the stupid dinosaur. "This ain't no TV show. This is the real world."

"You mean…" Barney began to tear up. "My whole life was a lie?"

"I'd hate to break it to you," said a cowgirl named Jesse. "But you're right. You're not the real Barney. You're just a stuffed doll that was made in a factory in China."

Barney began to bawl like a little baby. All the toys groan and covered their ears.

"You know what?" said Rex. "I take back what I said about wanting another dinosaur."

Just then, the so-called Barney began to giggle like an idiot. Those giggles turned into hysterics.

"Now what?" said Mr. Potato Head

"Great news, you guys!" said Barney. I just thought of this funny joke and now I feel so much better! Would you like to hear it?"

"No," refused the toys.

"What do you call a sleeping bull?"

"We don't wanna hear it," said Woody.

"A bull _dozer!" _Barney began guffawing and parading around like a moron. He stopped and looked at the toys. "This reminds me of another song I heard. Wanna sing along?"

"NO!" exclaimed the toys.


	2. Chapter 2

Later that day, Woody was sitting on top of Bonnie's desk fooling with a Magic 8-ball. He was hoping that the ball would give him faith of Barney ever disappearing.

"Will Barney get struck by a meteor?" Woody shook the ball. The words DON'T COUNT ON IT revealed itself through the black liquid.

"'Don't count on it'?! Aw, come on!" Woody threw the ball across the desk. The ball rolled to the other side and fell into the large gap between the desk and wall. Woody sighed. Just then he heard some annoying singing coming from behind him. It was Barney, of course. He was taking his hourly walk around the room. Just then, Woody's plastic head hatched an evil scheme. He began to call help out to Barney. Barney heard Woody and walked up to him.

"What's wrong, friend?" Barney asked the cowboy doll.

"There is a toy trapped behind the desk and I can't save him!"

"No-problamo! I'll help you! After all, it's great to help friends that are in need."

"Yeah, yeah. Just save the toy."

"Okeydokey!" replied Barney.

Barney peered down the gapped and tried looking for the toy.

"I can't see him."

"Oh, trust me. He's down there," Woody insisted as he pulled out a remote controlled car. Woody began operating the car. At high speed, the car started to zoom towards Barney. Before Barney knew it, the car hit him and he was sent flying through the window. Barney landed safely on a pile of leaves.

"That sure was a close one!" Barney began chortling like an idiot, but was then interrupted by a loud snarling noise. Barney looked behind him and noticed a pit bull growling at him. The dog was just finished murdering a stray cat and craved more. Thinking the sentient dinosaur toy was an animal, it was ready to attack. Of course Barney being the brainless reptile he is was encouraging the creature.

"Awww!" Barney said. "What a cute doggy! Here boy! Here boy!"

In the blink of an eye, the canine lunged at Barney and sank its teeth into the purple cloth. The dog thrashed the toy around, scattering fluff all across the grass. When the dog was finished, all that was left was Barney's remains spread across the lawn, and that was the last we heard of the prehistoric nuisance.


End file.
